Friday, July 28, 2017
Friday, July 21, 2017
Friday, July 14, 2017
Monday, July 10, 2017
To All Their Mommas
I'm in my mid thirties. An Aries. MDRD by day. Musician by night. Turned professional crafter. LOVE to decorate for every holiday. Bake a million things a week, and then deliver them to family, friends, and neighbors.
I'm 30 something, and have never brought a man home. To meet my family. My friends, became my family, when I needed them most! I'm independent. And stubborn. I'm not dating. And have no kids.
I have a home. Take care of my Momma. And our 2 pups. I'm also the ONLY female...between my parents' friends. Friends who all have sons. Who MOSTLY don't like their daughters-in-law. And constantly, want me to be their next daughter-in-law.
Let me tell you, as much as you know about me...you don't know the REAL ME. I know that most of these wonderful ladies, have known me at least 20 years. If not, my ENTIRE life. But you still don't know ME. The real person inside. That has dreamt of babes, since I was 4 years old. Who cries herself to sleep, because I miss my Daddy that much. And the woman who panics, because her Momma gets an unexpected pain.
I thought maybe, YOU needed this letter. You know, before you kick out your current DIL. And start planning for your son and I to get hitched. And have a million babes. Because this quiet girl...she's got a TON of baggage!
Dear Mommas,
Yes, I'm 30 something or another. You've never seen me bring home a boyfriend. Or heard me talk of one. But that doesn't mean, I don't have a history. That there hasn't been a gentleman or two...or however many, that hasn't stolen this girl's heart. With a deep southern drawl, heavy accent, blue eyes, loving spirit, or gentle heart.
My heart has done flips. And pitter patters. I've dreamt of a house full of the cutest blue eyed babes. I have looked like that heart eyed emoji...more than once. I've also had a house completely full, of 4 and unders. Playing games, decorating cupcakes, and dressed head to toe...in princess outfits. Because I'm the coolest Nana, Tia, and T-Lo around!
I'm much more, than the quiet and polite lady, that you see. Much more, than the gal that sends you cards for holidays and birthdays, shows up with pineapple upside down cake, or lends a hand...when you least expect it. Those are all things, that bring me joy. But it's the tiniest part, of who I am.
5 minutes before any event...I'm usually the last person you want to see. Short. Sometimes yelling. Running around in my underwear. A sea of clothes, on the floor. Trying to find the car keys. Probably herding 2 pups into the kitchen, dropping dog treats, 1 shoe on, trying to find my Mom's cane, and probably trying to wrap up some sort of dessert. Yes, I probably need a lesson in patience. And time management. And I'm probably a hot and sweaty mess!
I own too much makeup. Especially since IREFUSE only wear it to go to a funeral, wedding, and maybe out to a special dinner. Let's not talk about my nail polish collection. And how every single time, I open a drawer, at least 10 bottles come crashing out. Or the weirdness...that is my hair!
Surprise me with a visit? I'm probably in some sort of workout clothes. Or oversized sweats. With maybe a 25% chance, that I actually went on a walk that day. If you're real lucky, I'm in my PJs. Because what is better than PJs. I'm not sure, whether it is day 1, 2, or 3 in the same PJs. Going to daily Mass, has improved this somewhat. But who are we kidding.? I'm usually home by 7:30AM...and back in those PJs.
I'm less likely to have $20 in my purse to lend you. And 99.9% sure, you'll instead find yarn and a crochet hook. Because I'm impossibly behind on my orders. Yes, I'm a college educated woman. With hundreds of thousands of dollars, worth of degrees. And I haven't worked full time, in so many years...I can't remember. Because my family comes first! And I've been a full time caregiver, for 7 years. Oh, and I'm ALMOST 100% certain, that I'll have a piece of dark chocolate in that purse.
Speaking of families, I pray that your son, is close to his siblings. I know he comes from a good family...because I know you. But I don't know about his relationships, with his siblings. I say this, because mine suck! Bad! Not all my fault. It's just what happens in a blended family. That didn't blend well. And I want to have some good relationships in my life. I want my kiddos, to have aunts and uncles...that I can trust. Who will love my kiddos, unconditionally.
A total bonus, if your son takes my Momma out. Like once a month. Nothing fancy. Maybe to lunch. Or to the Natural History Museum. Something. Get to know her. Love her, like she's their momma. Make her feel included. I'm all she's got.
Know that I will try my hardest, to split holidays. Between our families. But truth be known...there is no negotiating on Christmas Eve. From 4-7PM...we will be at the cemetery. Decorating graves. Visiting my Daddy. It's what we do. And it will NOT change. We also don't open presents, until Christmas morning. After church...and breakfast. Who am I kidding...we're lucky to open Christmas presents before New Year's Day. It's ALWAYS been this way in my family!
I'm hard headed. Set in my ways. I don't trust people. I find it hard to let people in. I don't communicate well. I almost always check messages (text, FB, emails) 2 months too late. But if your someone special, I always try my best to call you. Or send you something in the mail. Speaking of mail, I LOVE to get a handwritten card or note...even a cute picture from a kiddo.
I like to spend lazy Sundays, reading books. Rainy nights, on the porch. Doing nothing. But watching the rain fall. And early mornings, alone with my Bible. Church is also a MUST! Every single Sunday. No questions asked. God is #1 in my life. And I pray every single day, to find a man, who has put God in that #1 spot too!
If your son doesn't like dogs, we probably won't like each other. I'm a Momma, to one very crazy girl. Who has to suck her Momma's thumb, like a bottle. And reads/watches Little Critter Go To Bed on my iPad. Just so she can sleep. Yes, she sleeps with me. And there is also a good chance, my Mom's crazy dog is sleeping with me too!
My dog, is like a baby. She has a better wardrobe, than most people I know. Gets multiple baths a week. Goes on car rides. Jams to Bruno Mars. Wakes me up, with puppy kisses. And steals everyone's heart. She has better insurance than I have. And will most likely, become a big sister, before 2018.
Yes, I will cook for your son, do his laundry, and clean the house. I will change dirty diapers...but ONLY those of my own babes! Speaking of my babes...they will have cloth diapers and be breast fed. When they need baby food...I will make that too. I've had lots of practice with my Goddaughters!
I know you stalk my Instagram feed, Twitter page, and Facebook. And you comment about the food I make. But what you don't know is, when I'm tired...or it's too hot...we eat cereal. Or Little Cesar's pizza. I'm keeping it real here. But you can ALWAYS count on us having freshly baked cakes. And dog treats!
I also do my laundry at 2AM. Because I can't sleep. And it's cheaper. I like to hang my clothes on a clothesline. And do our dishes by hand. I don't like to share the remote. Or iron clothes. And I find it most comfortable, to sleep on the floor. Also, have you ever realized, I never use the restroom around you? I have a phobia about that. Only at home, and I don't like to share a bathroom. I know, I have problems! But you need to know these things.
I'm also crazy, when it comes to OCD. Either everything has it's place, or it's total chaos. I like to clean people's refrigerators...and closets. Nothing gives me more pleasure, than a well stocked pantry and fridge. That are organized. Oh, and on a regular I buy onions, garlic, cilantro, persimmons, mushrooms, broccoli rabe, and leeks. And I cook with them! If you're eating my food, these things are in the dishes I make!
But if your son is looking for anything fried...like chicken, sopapillas, or fries...I don't do it. I'm scared to death, of hot oil. I can't fry an egg, if my life depended on it! I also don't make posole, menudo, pig's feet, sheep's brain, or tamales. So you better be on speed dial. I don't eat them. And I don't make them.
I drive too fast. I've been told, my driving is a mix of Texas and Mexico. I get road rage. All the time! And HATE for people to mess with the radio. But I have music ADD in the car. I am also known for having crazy dance parties in my car! And NEVER wear my seat belt while driving. I get carsick, when anyone else drives. I also get paranoid. If I could, I'd wear 10 seat belts...when anyone else is driving.
When it comes to telling people no, I don't know how to do it. And get suckered into so much. That my calendar is always overflowing. With more things, than you can comfortably do. In reality, most weekends I wish I could stay home in bed. And not feel guilty.
Oh, and your son better love the Growers' Market. I spend so much time loading, unloading, setting up, tearing down, and making things for the Market. By the time I unload our stuff at 6:35AM, I'm sweating like a 500 lb man! And I tell my Mom, the first man to do this willingly, I will marry. It's the part of the Market Life, that I HATE!
I will be doing this, and other fundraising, for the rest of my life. No doubt about that. I take our foundation seriously. Although, there are some days, when I just want to ignore it. But I know it's important. So much of my day, is consumed with LFB.
Did I mention, I'm kinda crazy? The whole, "Watch out for the quiet ones..." well you may not know that side of me. Nor does my family. But I am kinda, well nuts. Ask my friends. I've been known to dance on bails of hay, because they were there. Or walk on top of farm fences. Pretend I was married...because my friend needed me to. To literally "Seal a Deal," he was making for his business. The people he was doing business with, needed him to be married. I don't know all the details of that deal. But it was worth millions. And I needed to fly across the country, multiply times. Going to crazy dinners, wearing a 5 million dollar ring. Talk about nuts!
Girls' Nights with my friends...I'm just glad I'm the "photographer" of the group. And no one has that documented. Because I don't know what I'd say. Vegas for us...was definitely about work. But we took the whole "Work hard, play harder" to heart. There have been crazy nights of dancing, hilarious game nights, and just wild and crazy times...that we can't talk about.
Even if my guys friends...we've had plenty of Poker Nights. That I'd like to relive. But NEVER talk about. The Crazy Lady comes out to play! But it's all in good fun! So is the crazy table top dancing Mariachi...that only comes out to play...when my friends are around. ;)
I can't explain why I own so many bustiers. Or crazy lingerie. How I once worked at Hooters. Or the crazy costumes I once wore, when we performed. And now, I won't wear shorts in public. Forget a bathing suit! Or anything that is remotely tight fitting. Or might show too much skin. I'm just not comfortable like that.
I'm quite short tempered. Hot headed. Short of patience. Strong willed. Get blinded by my goals. Have big dreams. And like alone time. I don't depend on others. Or ask for help. Too many people, give me anxiety. To be brutally honest, I think at times...I could live a pretty happy life, not actually seeing people.
When I think about kids, it makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. Unlike most women, I think it's a good thing, that your son has some littles. Or even teenagers. But I also want some babes of my own. I once wanted 12 kids. But these days, I'd be happy with 2. I have names picked out...but I won't tell you either!
My heart sings, when I see a man playing sports with his kiddos. I think it would be amazing to see your son, coaching his littles in some sort of team sport. Or dancing away, with his daughter. When I was a musician, that was the thing I enjoyed the most. Seeing a dad making a complete fool out of himself, to dance with his daughter. And to make her smile!
And music, definitely the center of my life. So I guess your son has to love that too! Like spending the evening in Old Town, listening to music. Or going to see Mariachis. Or concerts. Also, having our littles learn some sort of music.
Did I mention? I don't trust people. And want to be home, with my babes until they go to school. I want to be THAT parent, who volunteers. And makes Pinterest worthy snacks and treats. I want my kids, to have all the opportunities that I had. And to be able to follow their dreams.
I'm working on a lot of my issues. Turning to God. Giving him my struggles and worries. Praying on so many things. But I'm not perfect! Never have been. Never will be. I may have run into the ocean, in a MOH dress. After my friends' Disney wedding. Because my other friend proposed to me. At the time, drowning seemed like the best option...
I also find myself, pouring over orphaned baby pics. Thinking I might have to do this alone. And somewhere out there, is a babe that needs a momma. I also question myself daily. About the direction my life is taking. And if I'll ever go back to medicine. Because I'm not sure, my heart is in it anymore.
Even with all this, my heart is open. To all things that are possible. It might be your son. And it might not. I'm one woman. And there are quite a few of your sons. I pray hard every single day. And know, somewhere out there...my husband is doing life. That one day, we'll find each other. And his current adventures...he'll share them with me. As part of his history.
And I pray to God, that he makes me a better woman. Teaches me, the things I need to learn. Shows me, how to live a better life. And loves me, despite my faults. It's the only way really. To be together, making each other better people.
Who knows what the future holds for me. But don't think for one minute, that I'm perfect. Or that your son's life will automatically change...because I'm in it. As much life as we've lived together...you've seen a lot! But it's probably only been 10% of what makes me tick. So let's pray together. And see what happens.
XOXO,
Desiree
I'm 30 something, and have never brought a man home. To meet my family. My friends, became my family, when I needed them most! I'm independent. And stubborn. I'm not dating. And have no kids.
I have a home. Take care of my Momma. And our 2 pups. I'm also the ONLY female...between my parents' friends. Friends who all have sons. Who MOSTLY don't like their daughters-in-law. And constantly, want me to be their next daughter-in-law.
Let me tell you, as much as you know about me...you don't know the REAL ME. I know that most of these wonderful ladies, have known me at least 20 years. If not, my ENTIRE life. But you still don't know ME. The real person inside. That has dreamt of babes, since I was 4 years old. Who cries herself to sleep, because I miss my Daddy that much. And the woman who panics, because her Momma gets an unexpected pain.
I thought maybe, YOU needed this letter. You know, before you kick out your current DIL. And start planning for your son and I to get hitched. And have a million babes. Because this quiet girl...she's got a TON of baggage!
Dear Mommas,
Yes, I'm 30 something or another. You've never seen me bring home a boyfriend. Or heard me talk of one. But that doesn't mean, I don't have a history. That there hasn't been a gentleman or two...or however many, that hasn't stolen this girl's heart. With a deep southern drawl, heavy accent, blue eyes, loving spirit, or gentle heart.
My heart has done flips. And pitter patters. I've dreamt of a house full of the cutest blue eyed babes. I have looked like that heart eyed emoji...more than once. I've also had a house completely full, of 4 and unders. Playing games, decorating cupcakes, and dressed head to toe...in princess outfits. Because I'm the coolest Nana, Tia, and T-Lo around!
I'm much more, than the quiet and polite lady, that you see. Much more, than the gal that sends you cards for holidays and birthdays, shows up with pineapple upside down cake, or lends a hand...when you least expect it. Those are all things, that bring me joy. But it's the tiniest part, of who I am.
5 minutes before any event...I'm usually the last person you want to see. Short. Sometimes yelling. Running around in my underwear. A sea of clothes, on the floor. Trying to find the car keys. Probably herding 2 pups into the kitchen, dropping dog treats, 1 shoe on, trying to find my Mom's cane, and probably trying to wrap up some sort of dessert. Yes, I probably need a lesson in patience. And time management. And I'm probably a hot and sweaty mess!
I own too much makeup. Especially since I
Surprise me with a visit? I'm probably in some sort of workout clothes. Or oversized sweats. With maybe a 25% chance, that I actually went on a walk that day. If you're real lucky, I'm in my PJs. Because what is better than PJs. I'm not sure, whether it is day 1, 2, or 3 in the same PJs. Going to daily Mass, has improved this somewhat. But who are we kidding.? I'm usually home by 7:30AM...and back in those PJs.
I'm less likely to have $20 in my purse to lend you. And 99.9% sure, you'll instead find yarn and a crochet hook. Because I'm impossibly behind on my orders. Yes, I'm a college educated woman. With hundreds of thousands of dollars, worth of degrees. And I haven't worked full time, in so many years...I can't remember. Because my family comes first! And I've been a full time caregiver, for 7 years. Oh, and I'm ALMOST 100% certain, that I'll have a piece of dark chocolate in that purse.
Speaking of families, I pray that your son, is close to his siblings. I know he comes from a good family...because I know you. But I don't know about his relationships, with his siblings. I say this, because mine suck! Bad! Not all my fault. It's just what happens in a blended family. That didn't blend well. And I want to have some good relationships in my life. I want my kiddos, to have aunts and uncles...that I can trust. Who will love my kiddos, unconditionally.
A total bonus, if your son takes my Momma out. Like once a month. Nothing fancy. Maybe to lunch. Or to the Natural History Museum. Something. Get to know her. Love her, like she's their momma. Make her feel included. I'm all she's got.
Know that I will try my hardest, to split holidays. Between our families. But truth be known...there is no negotiating on Christmas Eve. From 4-7PM...we will be at the cemetery. Decorating graves. Visiting my Daddy. It's what we do. And it will NOT change. We also don't open presents, until Christmas morning. After church...and breakfast. Who am I kidding...we're lucky to open Christmas presents before New Year's Day. It's ALWAYS been this way in my family!
I'm hard headed. Set in my ways. I don't trust people. I find it hard to let people in. I don't communicate well. I almost always check messages (text, FB, emails) 2 months too late. But if your someone special, I always try my best to call you. Or send you something in the mail. Speaking of mail, I LOVE to get a handwritten card or note...even a cute picture from a kiddo.
I like to spend lazy Sundays, reading books. Rainy nights, on the porch. Doing nothing. But watching the rain fall. And early mornings, alone with my Bible. Church is also a MUST! Every single Sunday. No questions asked. God is #1 in my life. And I pray every single day, to find a man, who has put God in that #1 spot too!
If your son doesn't like dogs, we probably won't like each other. I'm a Momma, to one very crazy girl. Who has to suck her Momma's thumb, like a bottle. And reads/watches Little Critter Go To Bed on my iPad. Just so she can sleep. Yes, she sleeps with me. And there is also a good chance, my Mom's crazy dog is sleeping with me too!
My dog, is like a baby. She has a better wardrobe, than most people I know. Gets multiple baths a week. Goes on car rides. Jams to Bruno Mars. Wakes me up, with puppy kisses. And steals everyone's heart. She has better insurance than I have. And will most likely, become a big sister, before 2018.
Yes, I will cook for your son, do his laundry, and clean the house. I will change dirty diapers...but ONLY those of my own babes! Speaking of my babes...they will have cloth diapers and be breast fed. When they need baby food...I will make that too. I've had lots of practice with my Goddaughters!
I know you stalk my Instagram feed, Twitter page, and Facebook. And you comment about the food I make. But what you don't know is, when I'm tired...or it's too hot...we eat cereal. Or Little Cesar's pizza. I'm keeping it real here. But you can ALWAYS count on us having freshly baked cakes. And dog treats!
I also do my laundry at 2AM. Because I can't sleep. And it's cheaper. I like to hang my clothes on a clothesline. And do our dishes by hand. I don't like to share the remote. Or iron clothes. And I find it most comfortable, to sleep on the floor. Also, have you ever realized, I never use the restroom around you? I have a phobia about that. Only at home, and I don't like to share a bathroom. I know, I have problems! But you need to know these things.
I'm also crazy, when it comes to OCD. Either everything has it's place, or it's total chaos. I like to clean people's refrigerators...and closets. Nothing gives me more pleasure, than a well stocked pantry and fridge. That are organized. Oh, and on a regular I buy onions, garlic, cilantro, persimmons, mushrooms, broccoli rabe, and leeks. And I cook with them! If you're eating my food, these things are in the dishes I make!
But if your son is looking for anything fried...like chicken, sopapillas, or fries...I don't do it. I'm scared to death, of hot oil. I can't fry an egg, if my life depended on it! I also don't make posole, menudo, pig's feet, sheep's brain, or tamales. So you better be on speed dial. I don't eat them. And I don't make them.
I drive too fast. I've been told, my driving is a mix of Texas and Mexico. I get road rage. All the time! And HATE for people to mess with the radio. But I have music ADD in the car. I am also known for having crazy dance parties in my car! And NEVER wear my seat belt while driving. I get carsick, when anyone else drives. I also get paranoid. If I could, I'd wear 10 seat belts...when anyone else is driving.
When it comes to telling people no, I don't know how to do it. And get suckered into so much. That my calendar is always overflowing. With more things, than you can comfortably do. In reality, most weekends I wish I could stay home in bed. And not feel guilty.
Oh, and your son better love the Growers' Market. I spend so much time loading, unloading, setting up, tearing down, and making things for the Market. By the time I unload our stuff at 6:35AM, I'm sweating like a 500 lb man! And I tell my Mom, the first man to do this willingly, I will marry. It's the part of the Market Life, that I HATE!
I will be doing this, and other fundraising, for the rest of my life. No doubt about that. I take our foundation seriously. Although, there are some days, when I just want to ignore it. But I know it's important. So much of my day, is consumed with LFB.
Did I mention, I'm kinda crazy? The whole, "Watch out for the quiet ones..." well you may not know that side of me. Nor does my family. But I am kinda, well nuts. Ask my friends. I've been known to dance on bails of hay, because they were there. Or walk on top of farm fences. Pretend I was married...because my friend needed me to. To literally "Seal a Deal," he was making for his business. The people he was doing business with, needed him to be married. I don't know all the details of that deal. But it was worth millions. And I needed to fly across the country, multiply times. Going to crazy dinners, wearing a 5 million dollar ring. Talk about nuts!
Girls' Nights with my friends...I'm just glad I'm the "photographer" of the group. And no one has that documented. Because I don't know what I'd say. Vegas for us...was definitely about work. But we took the whole "Work hard, play harder" to heart. There have been crazy nights of dancing, hilarious game nights, and just wild and crazy times...that we can't talk about.
Even if my guys friends...we've had plenty of Poker Nights. That I'd like to relive. But NEVER talk about. The Crazy Lady comes out to play! But it's all in good fun! So is the crazy table top dancing Mariachi...that only comes out to play...when my friends are around. ;)
I can't explain why I own so many bustiers. Or crazy lingerie. How I once worked at Hooters. Or the crazy costumes I once wore, when we performed. And now, I won't wear shorts in public. Forget a bathing suit! Or anything that is remotely tight fitting. Or might show too much skin. I'm just not comfortable like that.
I'm quite short tempered. Hot headed. Short of patience. Strong willed. Get blinded by my goals. Have big dreams. And like alone time. I don't depend on others. Or ask for help. Too many people, give me anxiety. To be brutally honest, I think at times...I could live a pretty happy life, not actually seeing people.
When I think about kids, it makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. Unlike most women, I think it's a good thing, that your son has some littles. Or even teenagers. But I also want some babes of my own. I once wanted 12 kids. But these days, I'd be happy with 2. I have names picked out...but I won't tell you either!
My heart sings, when I see a man playing sports with his kiddos. I think it would be amazing to see your son, coaching his littles in some sort of team sport. Or dancing away, with his daughter. When I was a musician, that was the thing I enjoyed the most. Seeing a dad making a complete fool out of himself, to dance with his daughter. And to make her smile!
And music, definitely the center of my life. So I guess your son has to love that too! Like spending the evening in Old Town, listening to music. Or going to see Mariachis. Or concerts. Also, having our littles learn some sort of music.
Did I mention? I don't trust people. And want to be home, with my babes until they go to school. I want to be THAT parent, who volunteers. And makes Pinterest worthy snacks and treats. I want my kids, to have all the opportunities that I had. And to be able to follow their dreams.
I'm working on a lot of my issues. Turning to God. Giving him my struggles and worries. Praying on so many things. But I'm not perfect! Never have been. Never will be. I may have run into the ocean, in a MOH dress. After my friends' Disney wedding. Because my other friend proposed to me. At the time, drowning seemed like the best option...
I also find myself, pouring over orphaned baby pics. Thinking I might have to do this alone. And somewhere out there, is a babe that needs a momma. I also question myself daily. About the direction my life is taking. And if I'll ever go back to medicine. Because I'm not sure, my heart is in it anymore.
Even with all this, my heart is open. To all things that are possible. It might be your son. And it might not. I'm one woman. And there are quite a few of your sons. I pray hard every single day. And know, somewhere out there...my husband is doing life. That one day, we'll find each other. And his current adventures...he'll share them with me. As part of his history.
And I pray to God, that he makes me a better woman. Teaches me, the things I need to learn. Shows me, how to live a better life. And loves me, despite my faults. It's the only way really. To be together, making each other better people.
Who knows what the future holds for me. But don't think for one minute, that I'm perfect. Or that your son's life will automatically change...because I'm in it. As much life as we've lived together...you've seen a lot! But it's probably only been 10% of what makes me tick. So let's pray together. And see what happens.
XOXO,
Desiree
Friday, July 7, 2017
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